明けましておめでとう！

Akemashite omedetou! Happy New Year!

A new year dawns, complete with the promise of new blog entries, full of apologies about not writing ^_^

In looking back over the past year, I'm pretty grateful for all my experiences. It wasn't the worst year ever, it wasn't the best year ever, but everything I experienced has put me on the path to becoming a more awesome person.

I'm thankful for coming to terms with my depression. When I think of how many years I have been wandering around in a fog, I'm amazed that I made it out of bed every morning. Since beginning treatment in September, I have made great strides toward becoming a fully functioning member of society ^_^ Okay, maybe not great strides, but some little baby strides.

I'm glad I took Aki in. He's a handful, and when he destroys things I often wonder if he's worth it, but when he leans in so I can skritch his chest and lets out a big sigh, I know I did the right thing. Also, he gets me out walking, which helps with the whole "too depressed to exercise" thing.

I sold some quilts! Quilting has been a hobby for me for many years now, but it's never been something I thought I was good enough at to make any money. I love doing it, and am happiest when my quilts find a home where they are enjoyed, but to think that I can earn some of the material cost back is pretty awesome.

I have a great network of family and friends. My parents and sisters are awesomesauce, and I am looking forward to seeing them all in June for Hezz's wedding. My friends in Faro who look after me, my friends back in Ontario who remind me of my roots, and my friends overseas who remind me of who I have been and will be again...I wouldn't be myself without them.

But, this wouldn't be a proper New Year's Day post without some goals for 2012, so here they are:

1. Be furiously happy. I discovered this concept earlier this year via The Bloggess's presentation at Ignite Evo - this video right here. If this means taping pictures of velociraptors all over town, gluing rhinestones to my truck, or taking a half-day every Wednesday to play with the dog, I want to do it. My parking spot is marked with a "Beware of Velociraptor" sign, and it makes me smile every morning. Do ridiculously silly, stupid things.

2. Work harder at failing. This is self-explanatory to me - as much as I want to just be automatically good at new things, statistics show that there is a correlation between practice and perfection. Note - I am not interested in perfection, per se, but in proficiency. I know that I need to fail at things in order to become any good at them. (Right now, I'm thinking about the free-motion quilting aspects of my life, but I'm also signed up for archery at the Rec Centre on Thursday nights, and I'm just letting my fellow students know in advance - y'all should probably be standing behind me when I let the arrows loose - just sayin'...)

3. Forgive more. I know that I am carrying around baggage from years ago. Sometimes, it feels like I've been carrying things around for centuries. This year, I want to release more of those suitcases of guilt and anger and hurt feelings and hopelessness. I don't want to be bent under the weight of things I haven't faced and haven't forgiven. (This may require some wine, though. And chocolate. And Kleenex.)

4. Leave my main bad habits behind. This one doesn't need to be expanded on in public ^_^

5. [REDACTED] Sorry, this one is personal, too.


So, that's what 2012 had better shape up to be - furiously happy, full of failures, and free of past hurts. Woooo!